That’s fantastic I’m glad to hear you were able to reconnect. Thank you for your reply, it does help.

Lol! That is true and I’d be in a totally different place in my life had I done that. I am grateful for those experiences for sure and wishing won’t change the past. One thing I keep coming back to though is maybe I should try to reconnect with some of these people that I once knew, because I have this habit of not keeping up with people that aren’t in my immediate social circle (out of sight, out of mind and all that) so I haven’t talked to alot of people I once considered friends for years. I get anxious at the thought of talking to them again and I know that’s irrational. Have you ever gotten back in touch with old friends that you did this to, how did they take it when you tried to contact them?

I think for most Americans who want to leave it’s going to be hard or unattainable. This is a VERY broad generalization and anecdotal, but any time I’ve looked into moving to other countries (primarily European countries), it has seemed that you need to be a skilled worker or have a lot of capital to support yourself while you work through the visa process to stay as a student or an entrepreneur or whatever. Having only a bachelor’s degree in German and International affairs (and that degree has aged 10 years), that doesn’t include me; I’m not a Doctor, not computer scientist, nor an engineer, or any other type worker that could be described as skilled and I don’t have a lot of spare cash either.

Sorry I’m about to rant, but I need to get this off my chest so skip if you don’t care to read this: Currently, I can’t afford to go back to school, so I’m hard-pressed to figure out how I could make it happen. I interned in Germany for a year way back and I’m kicking myself that I didn’t use my time while I had the residence permit to better myself and try to get an in by applying for a master’s program at nearby universities or seeking further employment with NGOs, non-profits, or companies willing to bring me in. Instead I treated the experience as a vacation and while I have lots of good memories and I learned a lot and I now speak the language well (and I still do after a decade) I keep coming back to how I could have done more. I did not get a permanent place in the company I worked with and I did not build my network, it makes me sad that I did this to myself. I want to go back to Germany for my own reasons that have nothing to do with today’s politics, I just felt like I fit in there. I don’t feel entirely hopeless about my prospects of returning, but I’ve increased the difficulty substantially by letting so much time pass without taking further steps. Now I’m just confused and don’t know where to begin (again.)

In any case, that was only my experience; your milage may vary as they say and if you did read the last paragraph, then I appreciate you listening. I would actually be interested to hear other people’s experiences as to how they made it abroad and how they did it and what trials the experienced along the way. If any of you are considering moving to another country, whatever the reason, I sincerely hope achieve that goal. Living abroad is an experience that I would encourage anyone who can manage it.

Edited for grammar and spelling

Fair enough I see this conversation is centered around first impressions and dating, but in a more general context it worries me. I see polarization in general as a net harm, because it divides us as people. Creates isolated points of view, otherizing, makes more people comfortable with perpetrating violence against the other because they are ignoring the other’s humanity. I’m not equivocating, tolerance for intolerant opinions is not acceptable, but people can be ignorant for one reason or another, it doesn’t make them evil.

Maybe I’m just in an echo chamber here and that’s why my dissenting opinion is getting so much backlash, but I’ll always advocate for nuance. I’ve met many with rather differing opinions, opinions which I’m categorically opposed to, but further conversation has revealed these people to be good on the whole. And non-violent to boot. We grew and understood each other from a conversation. I see so much bandwagoning on the Internet and all I want is for people to think a little more deeply about it. I get very emotional seeing people go, “Yeah! Fuck them for having that thought!” Because it reflects back at me a fear of being misunderstood, but I choose to speak up in hopes that it will bring about a more rational conversation.

By all means if your gut tells you run, run. All I’m saying is that simply holding a single, opinion is not nearly enough information. What scares me to begin with is that ideas are so polarizing that it turns off our ability to think. Not everyone who holds an opinion is polarized though, some people may be on the fence and that may show in their attitude. A better metric for measuring someone’s moral compass would be how they treat waiters or waitresses or how they respond to animals.

And that’s jumping to conclusions, why would having an interest in a podcast automatically make one make you believe that the other thinks of you as lesser. Adults should have adult conversations with each other.

It’s an interesting study and I understand why people would feel that way, the only thing that rubs me the wrong way about these things is the human tendency to paint someone in a totally negative light once they see the “red flag.” I feel the comments are evidence to that fact. If you know someone who hold offensive opinions you should actually ask them why they hold that opinion. People are enormously complex and their personalities or even morals cannot be boiled down to a small handful of extremely polarizing opinions.

Starting this day (and week) with a new diet full of fresh produce and lean proteins. Doing a trial run to see what sticks. Trying to improve relationship with food. I feel satisfied with breakfast, so it’s off to a positive start.

I’m guessing art installation, I can’t imagine why one would build the stalls like that otherwise.