I feel like I just read a Dr. Bronner’s soap bottle label.

I’m sorry but why does he look like an aging emo?

I love this! Free cat scratchers might not seem like they have much value, but has anyone seen the price of those ready-made things?! They’re pushing $20 for a large-ish flat scratcher at lower volume places like TSC, but Target isn’t much better, still $10 for a 10" x 18" flat cheapy.

Down with bougie cat cardboard!!!

Oh

Oh no

[Ah yes, a solid B+ troll, using the “are you all right” trope to get a rise out of me. The following would be my “rise.”]

Oh for cripes sake, can you not see I was leaning into your trolling mindset with my first bit?!! Keep fuckin moving the goalpost, y’all are good at that.

[Yes, I clearly suspended my disbelief in trying to see what exactly is legitimate under all of what you’ve said so far. It’s a fascinating occupation you’ve taken on, Professional Troll of Dubious Intent (PTODI), but if even if you actually don’t harbor these shitty thoughts against people, you are literally, actually right this moment making the entire platform of discourse shittier. I guess I should step outside my human brain and understand that some purported humans just want to watch the world burn. Sigh… Fuckin PTODIs.]

Aaaaand now I wonder if you (and your friend) are experiencing a wicked case of DID. Please consult your totally real psychologist on that for more info on how to reign in your diverging personalities. (Wouldn’t wanna have to get your lawyer involved, you know, like if your online troll personality state starts wreaking legal havoc in real life. Who would be to blame? You?! Or you?!!?!)

Serious question. And making the forgiving assumption your “friend” wasn’t just a cover story. This troll business you opened up here, do you you actually believe and stand behind what you profess?

It took me all of 90 seconds to read through your comment history and confirm you are in some kind of pain, the kind that breeds misplaced anger at the lack of stability in your own identity.

You did, however, ponder one valuable bit of insight at the end of your recent AITA post (15 days ago) regarding your wife quitting her job and her not listening to you. Please follow your instinct here. Please do be open to your wife about going your separate ways.

Real talk, she will be better off without you. You act as if she’s holding you back, all the while it sounds like she’s been holding you up. It seems you are the one holding both of you back, and projecting this financial and identity instability onto others is illustrative of your own issues.

You don’t seem like a legitimate troll. You seem like you’re fighting for your own identity and you’re projecting your frustrations by asserting other people are deluded in knowing who they are and somehow insane for wanting a modicum of human respect. Yet I think you and many, many others like you, are those truly struggling.

I think you are currently showing a lack of respect to others because, deep down, you don’t respect yourself. And that is not okay. Needing and seeking help and direction from others, including mental health professionals, is not a blue-haired liberal thing, it’s a human thing. Please consider it.

Nobody seems to like you here, Mister Bias Bot…

I must admit, I am a bit high right now, but I tittered heartily at your lighthearted turnabout, and then my mind, well, now it’s blown, because I now must ask… Does any particular ethnicity or racial identity have a statistically significantly higher birth rate than any and all other identity groups simply because, and with all other factors controlled for, they find themselves and people like them just so irresistibly sexy that they can’t help but have the sexy sex with each other, and because they are both so damn sexy they can’t even right now, and “we’re having sex can’t you see” and ask you to come back later to ask your weird sex questions???

Any particular one? … Anyone?

When you said “check for [spy] bugs,” I first thought you meant literal insecty bugs, and that made plenty of rational sense to me, because who wouldn’t come back with even more potent insecticide to douse those couches, maybe some Super-Potent Fabric-Penetrable Bug Annihilator, one formulated for Previously Penetrated Couches, in order to kill the very particular kinds of creepy crawly bugs that JD seems like he carries around on his creepy crawly body.

You know, I’ve been thinking … There’s gotta be another layer of complexity in all that projection vectored through his hating on “childless cat ladies” nonsense, other than the obvious “I’m scared of happily independent women” business.

Fleas. I’m thinking he has fleas. JD Vance has fleas. You know, because something, something, cats.

Bed bugs would also make sense. Him fucking furniture and all. Bed bugs are, after all, the herpes of the craft couch-coitus world.

Not too bad! All things considered anyway. I started coming down with what turned out to be COVID last Thursday (sigh), 4 days after returning from an insanely fun time at Chicago’s Riot Fest (yay!). Lucky for me, it’s been the equivalent of a moderate cold, with much less fatigue and lack of desire to do literally anything than when I had it the first time 14 months ago. Then again, I slept well into Friday afternoon and now I can’t sleep again and it’s 4am CDT, oops.

Back to Riot Fest though… Oh man, I wish I could go back! Seeing 17 full sets from various punk rock, emo, indie, avant-garde, metal, post-hardcore bands was the highlight of my year. Turnstile, Death Cab for Cutie, Queens of the Stone Age, Mr. Bungle, AFI, and The Dresden Dolls were probably my favorite. Hawthorne Heights and Silverstein were solid, Bowling for Soup was surprisingly fun, and Death Grips was just inteeense. I’m really sad I missed Corey Feldman though, huehue.

Anywho, this is my first post ever on Lemmy. I have no idea how this will even show up (username? at something?) so this is fun. Cheers!