Genq with the title, it is hard for me to not respond to them because I lack self control, especially when Im not feeling well

On a better note, how are you all?

  • Ada@lemmy.blahaj.zoneM
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    1 year ago

    I never used to be able to on twitter and Reddit. But then I experienced social media without them, and it was a revelation. It showed me just how toxic it was. And quite simply, I don’t want to have that toxicity in my life anymore, so I don’t feel compelled to engage

  • Nougat@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    If the comment is obvious flame bait, nothing needs to be said.

    However, if someone is making a bad argument that sounds compelling at a glance, I think it’s important to rebut. Not because you’re trying to convince the original poster to take on a new view - that’s highly unlikely. No, you’re talking to other people reading the thread.

    I take it as my civic duty to enter into real debates against faulty reasoning.

  • Rozaŭtuno@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    1 year ago

    One thing that helped me was reframing who is in control of the situation.

    If you let any comment get to you it means you’re accepting that any bigot can decide to ruin your day whenever thay want, you’re giving them this power. You don’t own them an explanation, nor your time, you can be in control and choose to ignore them and be happy instead of angry.

    It’s not your duty to “fix” them, and even if it was, no one changes their ideology after just one conversation, screaming through a screen is not gonna improve either people’s day.

  • SharkEatingBreakfast@beehaw.org
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    1 year ago

    I equate it to trying to hold a rational, reasonable conversation with a guy screaming on a street corner: not going to happen.

    Walk on by and go about your day.

  • LadyAutumn@lemmy.blahaj.zoneM
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    1 year ago

    I used to do that all the time especially on reddit. I try not to frequent online spaces that are welcoming or tolerant of any bigotry. I also spend a lot less time on social media than I used to. But that being said if I do see something on here thats bigoted in any way I will say something.

    • Rose@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOP
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      1 year ago

      Yeah

      I only see the bigots on youtube tbh, do not go into the comments of JammiDodger’s videos

      Hru today Autumn?

      • LadyAutumn@lemmy.blahaj.zoneM
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        1 year ago

        Really? That’s awful i love JammiDodger :( I’ve seen some of the videos where he talks about the hate he gets. It’s terrible.

        Im doing good, tired and my sleep schedule is a little messed up but it was a good day. :)

        • Rose@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOP
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          1 year ago

          Thats nice. Please remember to rest.

          And yeah, Jammi’s videos comments sections are filled with excuses for carbon based life who are obsessed with him and hateful

          At least channels like The Click and One Topic At A Time have good comments sections that arent filled with bigots

  • Toni Widmo@embers.social
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    1 year ago

    @StarlightRose On twitter I often did respond, but then block them before they could reply back. My thinking was that I wasn’t talking to them, but rather to people reading the thread that needed to see their fallacies debunked. Giving them the chance to respond was just allowing more bad faith arguments made of logical fallacies, so it is never a good idea.

    • Rose@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOP
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      1 year ago

      Honestly, when I still used twitter, I would usually just block on sight since they arent worth my time or energy

      They were usually bait accounts.

      Shame melon husk wants to remove the block feature because his fascist friends are mad they cant target harass people

    • amethyst@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      1 year ago

      That’s always been my take too.

      A tip I got at some point was that if you feel smug/self-satisfied about posting something, it’s probably just better that you don’t. Trying to win internet points by owning bigots is not making the world better, and it certainly never made me happy either.

      But you do want other, uninformed folks to be able to see how flawed the bigots arguments really are, and if you have the energy its worthwhile putting that out there.

  • TaygetaDuck@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    1 year ago

    Young me would try to argue with them because I thought I could change their mind / opinions.

    Even trying to kill them with kindness doesn’t get them to change the way they feel or act.

    So I just blissfully ignore them. I can’t control what people say about me, or what people think about me, what I can control is whether or not I let their feelings affect my emotional state. I just try to be best most honest version of myself, sometimes I fall short of that, but generally I treat people how I want to be treated. And if they reply with hatred, or disrespect then I cut them out of my life as much as I can 😊

  • cunnilingsus@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    1 year ago

    There’s usually a blocklist or two for whatever social media site you’re using that can help prune them out. I also try and make sure that the spaces I frequent, both online and offline, are explicitly pro-trans since it makes most bigots uncomfortable.

  • Moonrise2473@feddit.it
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    1 year ago

    Just block them and enjoy life, they are subhumans that enjoy the confrontation

    Or maybe just reply with some canned reply that will make them look idiot, then block

  • Crankpork@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    Bigots gonna bigot, and no matter what I say they won’t listen, so all that’s going to happen is I’ll get mad and it’ll ruin my day and they’ll go on blissfully bigoting. I really really try to stop myself, for my own health.

    Sometimes it’s not about changing their mind though, it’s about showing others that there’s people who will stand up, and I can’t help myself with those.

  • violetraven@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    1 year ago

    I don’t spend as much time online as I used to. Playing roller derby has helped me realize that these people do it most of the time because it’s easy to do while being somewhat anonymous. Us women don’t act like that with each other and the ones that do are typically kept out of reach with the Karens, the Christians, and the qanons. They’re all cut from the same blood libel, satanic panic cloth as it was from the 80s and 90s. I’d be more shocked if they had an original thought.

  • Corvus Nyx@beehaw.org
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    1 year ago

    It takes too much energy I don’t have. Most folks like that aren’t moved by reason, and part of their end goal is to exhaust with a constant stream of BS. There are much more fruitful discussions to be had elsewhere.

  • Chloepoke@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    1 year ago

    It is hard sometimes not to engage with bigots and bigotry in general…it just seems so senseless to me, I am always begging the universe to just give me the right words to change someone’s mind…but that is not how it works…bigotry is something far beyond and unbeholden to the realms of emotion and logic.